Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Shopping for Singles and Online Dating Tips for Dudes

After hearing that most all my unattached acquaintances are shopping for singles (for free!) at OkCupid (or OkStupid, as one friend said in a Freudian slip of the tongue), I decided to check it out. Just like other sites, you can enter certain criteria for a search, and scroll through pages of photos and catchy phrases. Unlike other sites, you answer a few questions, say how you'd like your date to answer them, and whether the question is highly relevant in your quest for a mate or a date for Friday night.  Some of them involve math, in hopes to weed out the OkStupids. Or science, such as, "Which is bigger, the earth or the sun?"  (To weed out the super-sized egos?)

After just days of being online, I have a few tips for the men playing the mating game.

Photos. If you have a photo of you lit only by the light of your computer screen, erase it immediately. My friend has challenged me to respond in total honesty to all emails, e.g., "Your profile photo is so frightening, I'm afraid if I met you for coffee I may not make it home alive.  But for the sake of your dating happiness, take another photo: more smile, less psycho."

Don't LIE, about your age, your current marital status, your allergies to cats.  We will find out immediately.  Especially if you posted an out-of-date photo.  It's gonna be obvious.

Write in full, complete sentences ("Hey" is not a sentence).  For fun, check your spelling.  Girls go for good grammar.  Find something in her profile to ask about. Don't be obscure. I have no response to "Travel with me" or "Cute."  (Also, not a sentence.)

I'm still baffled how to answer this email, written to my "handle," Rebecca_LA. 

"Hi, I'm Jack.  What's your name?"

Err... Rebecca. 

I got nothing. Was that fact not clear?  I'm worried about his answer to the earth vs. sun size question.  And suddenly, that seems very relevant. 

(Photo: Flickr via Writers Free Reference)


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